Thoughts on art & sex

michelaneglo-creation1302x649The other night, I found myself at home working on a crochet rug when I began to contemplate. . .

What is God’s purpose for art?

I asked myself, “Why did God create human beings with the ability and the desire to create?”

The first thing to pop into my head was “We are created in God’s image – God is the creator of all things. Therefore, we also create”

Okay, yes – of coarse, but that answer does not satisfy me.  There has to be something more.  When I am creating, I can see inside my soul.  My heart overflows with passion.  I can feel God, and I can hear His voice speaking. For me, creating is a spiritual experience, and I am wondering, what I am suppose to do with this. Does God have a purpose for art? Does He have a higher purpose for MY art? What if there is no other greater purpose than to give me the enjoyment of creating, and Him the pleasure of my artistic praises?  What if art is like sex and it exists only for the sake of passion, as an expression of my soul?

I truly believe that God LOVES to create.  He is creating all the time.  Look around and you can see this is evident. Every child born was first knit together in the mother’s womb by God himself. Every morning & every evening God paints the sky. Every pallet of color that is found in nature is a perfect color scheme.  I am reminded of a quote I once ready from G. K. Chesterton:

10120634-field-of-daisy-flowers  “It is possible that God says every morning, “Do it again” to the sun; and every evening, “Do it again” to the moon.  It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that god makes every daisy separately but has never got tired of making them. . . . The repetition in Nature may not be mere recurrence; it may be a theatrical encore.”

Is it that God so sweetly enjoys creating, that He wanted us to share in this experience with Him? Has he given us this gift simply for the edification of our souls?

Blue-Violet

RN879_paint_pigment_photograph_dioxazine_violet_detail_emRecently, I have been working on a fiber project.  I kept running into a problem with the logistics until one night I woke up at 4 am with the solution.  The next day, I was in the  car with my 9 yr old daughter l when I mentioned that I was tired. Of course my daughter asked me why and I told her about solving my fiber project problem at 4 am.

I went on to explain:

“Sometimes when you are a creative person, you wake up in the middle of the night with an idea.  It can be impossible to fall back to sleep until you try out your idea.”

My daughter’s reply:

“Yeah, that happened to me once. I woke up in the middle of the night wondering what purple & blue make when they are mixed together.  I just couldn’t go back to sleep until I figured it out.  So I went out to the kitchen & got some paper so I could mix blue & purple.  It just made a purple color, but at least then I knew.  Colors – you gotta love ’em.”

This little conversation warmed my heart.

I found freedom in worship

I have always considered myself an artist.

Every child thinks of themself as an artist.

orange flower

I was 13 when I realized that I really could actually draw when I applied myself.

Then, in high school, drawing became my demise academically.

High School artwork

I have had no other ambition in life other than to create.

Art has been one of my greatest joys.  Images move me deep down inside & my expressions most often come as colors and lines.  Art has also caused me great frustration & longing as my hands long to create, but the inspiration isn’t there.

I have experienced fear that my artwork won’t be enough.  That when I am finished, it won’t reveal the message I want it to express. I have feared that others will find my work dumb, and my ability lacking.  I have feared imperfection.  So, over the years, I have learned to silence my inner cravings to create art.

yellow flower

Recently however, I have been walking through a season of renewal.  A fire has been lit inside of me, a passion to explore art as a form of worship.  I have given myself permission to create as an outpouring of myself before God, & in doing so, I have experienced freedom.  In this place of worship, I am safe to just be me.  There is room for imperfection, because I am not perfect.  I am no longer searching for others to approve of  my artwork because my art is not meant for them.  It is meant for Abba, & I have faith, like a child that He will find my artwork to  be perfect just the way it is.

>>>> odosketch

My favorite things about the weekend is sleeping in late, eating a big family breakfast, and relaxing.  I really enjoy the extra time without any of the everyday pressures of having to be some place at a certain time.  It gives my kids time to be creative in their play which brings me joy in watching them. It gives my husband time to be creative in his workshop shaping wood.  I like to spend the extra time exploring the internet to find new, fun and inspiring places.

My most recently discovery (that I can see taking up too much of my time), is odosketch.  This creative website is a lot of fun. You can create your own sketches & look at sketches created by other people.

Go check it out & leave a link in the comments so I can see what you create!

 

Show Me You; a series

I was little when I asked Jesus into my heart – young enough that I still thought of Jesus physically being in my heart.  My salvation was real, I knew Jesus, and grew up active in our church.  I have never known life without Jesus in it.  However, as a teenager, I would wonder about my relationship with God.  I didn’t feel like I had passion in my relationship with Him.  I felt His fire at youth retreats and conventions, but I knew that was different than having passion.  So, I prayed for passion. Fast forward 15 years.  God has given me passion.  It often consumes me.  I feel like a cup that is overflowing, and I’m scrambling around in a frenzy of excitement trying to find out what to do with all of “it”.  “It” is a number things, like sharing God’s love & HOPE with Tibetans through knitting.  Another, is my artwork.  In the past I’ve simply let “it” spill out all over the place.  I don’t know what to do with “it”, so I start talking about “it” looking for direction as I wait to see what God is going to make out of the mess.

Mandy of Messy Canvas shared this statement on Facebook a while back.

“Quite frankly Christians, I’m ready to see you, not your Jesus.  Show me you.”

This status update & the conversation that follows has gripped me in such a way that months later, it still pulls at me.  It has started me down an internal path of wrestling.  I don’t know where the path will lead me, or even what direction it takes me.  When I’ve written my thoughts into a journal I seem to be all over the place in a kind of swirling ball of passion. I know that I have found something that is important, but I am unable to define it.  This single sentence has sparked a flame in me.  It is creating a passion for divine inspiration.  I’m searching for what to do about it as it is still very messy, swirling around in my heart & my head without any definition.

I have started the “Show Me You” series to give myself a place to  work through the swirling ball inside me.  I hope, dear reader, that you will jump in the conversation and offer your own thoughts & ideas to help me in my search for direction.