Being Present

IMG_9105In raising children, every parent hopes about what days will be like throughout the stages of life.  I always envision myself as a mother who is in tune with the seasons, exploring with my children the land around us, and taking advantage of everything that nature has to offer us.  My vision for our future always consist of a slower pace, offering us the time required to cherish and love life together as a family.  Each year, I make a promise to myself that next year will be different.  Next year, I’ll be the mom that I want to be, living the life that I want to live. Yet, here I sit, the last week of October, and once again, I feel that familiar panic rising in my heart over one more autumn that is slipping by without me being present.

My children are 9 & 10 this year, which is quite old if you ask me.  That’s 10 years of envisioning a life with my children that I have yet to actually embrace.  I ask myself, what is keeping me from making these dreams a reality, and in a word the answer is busyness.

What on Earth am I so busy doing?  Put simply, I’m preparing for the future.  Our family homeschools, so a large part of my time is spent preparing my children for their future.  Daily, I have conversations with my children about what the future may hold for them, and what skills they must learn to prepare for life as an adult.  I also busy myself working to earn money.  Granted, I love the work that I do.  However, there is pressure to store up treasures in an effort to secure a better future.  I am so busy preparing for tomorrow that the every day moments fly right past me without a notice.

Isn’t this why God has told us not to worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself (Mat. 6:34)?  I know that my God will provide for me. I know that “His eye is on the sparrow, and I know that He watches me”.  My faith is in Him, yet I continue to toil in an effort to secure a better future for my family.  What promise do we have that the securities we work to put in place today will brighten our tomorrow?  What promise do we have of there even being a tomorrow?  None.  We do however, have God’s promise that He will provide for our needs.  This week my challenge for myself & you as well, is to trust God.  Not just in word, but in how I choose to live life.

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